Update August 2005


IUpdate August 2005

Again almost a year has past since my last entry. Nothing happened worthwhile to write about except 3 weeks ago, when  again i had the pleasure to visit Pandora in London. This time I stayed in London for 4 days, meeting some friends visiting some night clubs. Of course the highlight was the visit to Pandora. Again it was utterly amazing how Pandora changed my looks from normal to glamorous. After the makeup and false eyelashes she took her comb and brush and within a few minutes my hair had a totally different look. A halve an hour later after some first pictures, she added a hairpiece, again some strokes with the brush, a tease here and there and bingo, again  II looked totally different.  This time it was elegance beyond compare. I looked ready for a reception at the queen.  I never had such a beautiful hairdo in my life. Too bad there was no fitting occasion that evening.  I went to the Way out club, which was great, but in no way did it justice to my looks. To see all pictures of that session go to my gallery.

Update October 2004

t’s a long time since I added anything in writing to this homepage. Many things happened which I thought worthwhile to write about, but every time it’s a matter of not having enough time.  

 Because of my limited time I will try to make my comments short. But first I would like to thank all those that have written to me or made notes in my guestbook. Your response has been overwhelming. It seams that my fight for sensibility and to consider the alternative to SRS is gaining ground. More and more voices come out of the bushes echoing my concerns. Only yesterday I found another homepage http://www.johanna16.freeler.nl/texte/vergleich.html (in German) pleading brilliantly for a halt to SRS.

 As a witness at the high court in London 

Somewhere in my bio I wrote of my work as an optometrist and of inventions that I had patented. One of my inventions is the colored contactlenes that are used today to change ones eye color. Because of this, I suddenly received a call of an attorney, asking me if I would be an expert witness at a coming trial at the high court in London. I said yes and was invited to come to London. 

For me there was only one problem my patent was assigned to my male name and the attorneys had no idea of my changes. When we spoke on the phone I never told them anything. Except when I sent them written testimony or my bills, my letterhead said clearly “Jacqueline” 

Now the great day came. I was staying at Browns Hotel and I was supposed to be picked up by one of the assistant of the law firm to chauffeur me to the court. The closer the time of meeting the assistant came the more nervous I was. Mostly I was concerned about the legalities and how the judge would react, expecting to see a man, but suddenly seeing a woman. Also I had found out that other witnesses to be present where former colleges, which I had not seen in over 20 years. How would they react? And the Attorneys? Had they read between the lines (my letterhead) that they would meet a woman?  For the first time in many years I was again confronted with my past. 

I waited nervously in the lobby, when a relative young woman appeared. I said: “You are probably looking for me.“„Oh yes, you must be Mrs. U.” she replied. The ice was broken and I felt a little bit better. In the car she explained to me the court procedures and the other people I was about to meet.

 Even before I entered the court, in the waiting area, I met one of the other witnesses a colleague of times gone by. He came up to me and said “Hello Jacqueline great to see you, how have you been. You remember me?” Another hurdle had been taken.

 It was a strange feeling entering an English court. To see the judge with his wig and the barrister also in wig and gown was a scene I remembered only from movies. I still was very nervous. I saw the mike at the witness stand. How would my voice sound? Enough feminine to pass?  When the present witness was finished. The judge said:“ Can we now have the next witness, Mrs U. would you kindly step forward.

 Wow what a relieve.  How did he know? During the 3 hours that the examination lasted I was always addressed as Mrs. I relaxed more and more and my testimony was a great success. For the defense attorney, which latter came to congratulate me, but mostly for myself. Again I had proven to myself that I could survive even very difficult situation.

 With my friends of the past I had a great time. We went out to dinner, we talked about old times, old friends, the case at hand, but never a word about my change to the woman I was now. That I considered my greatest triumph.

 Being in the newspaper

 Several months latter I received a call from “Blick” the biggest daily newspaper in Switzerland. They had heard about my testimony and also that Novartis the pharma giant had copied my patent. It was a newsworthy story and they wanted to talk to me. I had mixed feelings. I didn’t mind talking about the case, but I did not want to talk about my past. “Blick” is known as the biggest trash paper, living from indiscretion and sensationalism. I said yes and the journalist came to my house. We really only talked about the case, he took notes and another pictures. Then he suddenly asked if he also could write about my change. He had seen the patent, which said “Jacques” and put two and two together. I said under no circumstances and to my surprise he did accepted my vehement response. But could I trust him? I had two sleepless nights, but when the paper came out, it was really only about my patent, Novartis and me. The article was halve a page with a great picture of myself holding the patent. (See the article and the picture.


Why I adamantly refuse to expose myself in public and why I didn’t appear on Swiss television  

Maybe I should explain here why I’m adamantly against exposing myself in public. 23 Years ago was the first time I was approached by a well-known journalist to write my life story. He told me that such a book would be a great success, as well as financially very rewarding. I’m sure it would have been, because at that time, not like today, there where were very few books about people like me on the market. The offer was very tempting. I would have been the first Transgender to “come out”, in Switzerland and I would have had a lot of publicity.  I refused. My major reason where the people around me. My parents where still alive. My sister, my children and my partner. I did not think it would be fair to expose them to this kind of publicity. I wanted to protect them.

Since that time I have been asked many more times to tell my story publicly. I must admit it is not always easy to refuse. Today where my preoccupation is art, as a sculptress and jewellery designer, I’m sure it would bring me additional publicity, fame and would make staying in the limelight easier. Yet again I refuse. Next to protecting my immediate family, I also refuse, because I want to be recognised and known as the artist and the art I have created, and not some flux of nature.

It is also difficult to refuse when I’m asked to participate in a public discussion on Transgender, Transsexuality and SRS. My topic, SRS, that’s my fight! I’m sure I would have a lot to contribute. Many times I’m torn between the merits of telling my story and my principals. How my experiences could help others or how it could help reduce prejudice. There is of course yet another practical aspect. 99% of my present customers know nothing of my past and know me only as the woman I don’t know how they would react, but why should I jeopardize my present good relationship, with unknown factors. Or could I continue to play tennis in the ladies liga. (See article about tennis)

Only a few months ago I received a call from the offices of the biggest Swiss talk show and talk master (Kurt Aeschbacher) I was asked if I would participate. I was told they wanted to talk to me about my art and my accomplishments as a pioneer in the field of contact lenses. I had no objections and agreed. I met the editor of the show and we talked for several hours. At the end I was told he would present everything to his panel for a final OK. Being Transgender came up at the next meeting that again lasted several hours. The editor appealed to me to consider how I could help sway public opinion, by showing a successful transgender and not the common clichés of drag queens etc. Again it was difficult to refuse, but again I did and he promised, that the topic Transsexuality would not be touched He would confirm it by phone the next day.

The next day he confirmed it. I was thrilled to appear at the show. The show is on prime time and has a very high rating.  Everything was perfect. Until two day before the show, I got a call that they had a change of menu and that my appearance would be scheduled for a latter day. I was devastated, mad and disappointed. In the end I think it was my refusal to talk about my other past that killed the whole thing.

So you see, sticking to my principals is not always a wining proposition.

I never less won a smaller battle, because last week I appeared on the lifestyle show of Tele Zurich. I talked about my work, they took videos while I worked and the topic transgender never came up (See the picture on the right)


A dream comes true. Visiting Pandora’s Pledge  Click here to see all the pictures

Ever since I had seen Pandoras homepage I said to myself one day I want to go there. Since London is not exactly around the corner from Zurich it was a project, which I did not believe in too seriously. But some weeks ago it happened. I flew to London to let myself be pampered. Since I live every day as woman it is not that I don’t know how to apply make up. As a matter of fact I’m pretty proud, that I’m darn good at it. I was wondering could I really look better then what I’m now?

The most difficult part was getting there. I was told the fasted way from Heathrow was by Subway to Lancaster Station and then by Cab. To me the ride to Lancaster seamed endless. And the ride with the cab even longer. I was exhausted when I arrived. From the airport to Pandora had taken me over two hours.

But then I was in the hands of Pandora. When I was finished I could not believe my eyes. I think I never looked better or more beautiful. I was flabbergasted. But I let you be the judge. I devoted a whole page (more then I ever did) of picture to this exceptional event. I have continued to apply my make up, the way Pandora showed me. I’m getting raves, wherever I go. I can’t wait to return for another session.


My Bridal adventure  Click here to see all the pictures

Have you ever dreamed to visit a bridal shop and try on all the dresses? I did it, this spring. I told the woman that I planed a wedding and that I was looking for a dress. She was more than pleased, to help me select and try on various bridal dresses.

 More difficult was to convince her to take some pictures with my camera. I told her my husband wanted to see them and that he was out of town. She bought the story took the pictures and I bought in the end two beautiful evening gowns.  One with a beautiful petit coat. I will be wearing them at an upcoming special gala birthday and the coming ball season. I devoted a new whole page to the visit at the bridal store. The ball gowns will come later.


Being with the Bundesrat 

Last fall I was asked to present one of the 10 main prices at the yearly Press Ball. It was a gala affair and I was able to wear my latest evening robe. The main presenter was Ms.Metzler one of the seven members of our Bundesrat. The Bundesrat is equal to the president in other countries. During the presentation I was standing next to her. Unfortunately the best pictures did not come out (The one next to the Bundesrat). So I’m only showing a few.


My tennis team 

I have been playing tennis for many years. I love the sport. I play the weather allowing it twice a week. This year however was new. For the first time I played with 7 other women Interclub Championship.  It means playing against other clubs. Playing for points. We play in the lowest ranked group and unfortunately we ended up last. All  participants in my team, my co players have played for the first time in a liga, so we have lot to learn. Nobody knows about my past. 

But why do I mention such a trivial story. Because here too nobody knows about my past. I would like to show, how socially integrated and accepted one can get, without SRS. Its possible!


Click on any of the picures to see the larger format        See all new Pictures go to my gallery

New-Year eve 2003

Fly with me!Flying Ja Jan 2004 to Calif.

Ski vacation in Arosa March 2004

Holding my patent for the reporter

The Articel as it appeared in the paper

Being filmed for Television at my home and studio

Modeling at Fashionshow Club Med Nov.2003

The new me! Created at Pandora's Pledge Aug. 2004

Go tp Pandora Pledge's Homepage

Selectimg a bridal gown

Entering the Dolder Grand Hotel for the Presse Ball Nov.2003

Playing the game Oct.2004

Our tennis team July 2004